Cast of Characters
Judy and Joni: adult Nebraska farm women, any race
Larry and Kyle: their husbands, any race.
Setting & Synopsis
The southeastern part of Nebraska has been discovered
as the United States’ richest area for niobium, a mineral
that will aid in the battle against climate change. However,
the mining of this mineral will destroy the way of life of
the area residents. The possibility of imminent wealth puts
life-long friends at odds.
Nebraska. Early morning. The sound of a car pulling into
a gravel driveway. Two doors opening and closing. ENTER JONI,
a farm woman, carrying a couple bags of groceries. She sees
something in the distance. ENTER KYLE, a farmer, also carrying
groceries.
JONI
Sssh.
KYLE sees what JONI sees.
KYLE
She’s a beauty. Ope. There she goes.
The (offstage) doe is skittish and bolts away.
A moment later we hear a pick-up pull up. The
sound of two truck doors opening and slamming shut.
Go inside, Joni.
JONI does not exit. ENTER LARRY and JUDY, also
a farming couple.
LARRY
You see that doe?
KYLE
Yep.
LARRY
She’s going to make some good hunting this fall.
JONI
Judy, honey, why don’t you come inside. I’ll put on some coffee.
JUDY
We’re not staying.
LARRY
I guess you know why we’re here.
KYLE
Yeah.
LARRY
We signed.
KYLE
I heard.
LARRY
Can’t afford not to. Laughton’s signed too. Craig’s holding out for a better price, but none of us will get anything if you don’t sign.
KYLE
Then I guess you and Laughton’s got a couple worthless pieces of paper. Come on, Joni. Sorry ‘bout that, Larry.
LARRY
Kyle, you and me, Judy and Joni, we’ve all been friends since junior high. We were homecoming royalty, dammit. That means that once upon a time people thought of us as the future leaders of the community. We owe this to them.
KYLE
I had no idea a paper crown was so much responsibility.
JUDY
My crown was plastic, and you know it Kyle. As king and queen, we’ve got an obligation.
LARRY
Judy.
JONI
Honey, why don’t you come inside. I’ve got some Vander Meer’s cinnamon rolls in one of these bags here. I’ll pop ‘em in the oven and we can have some coffee. I got some juicy news about Carrie Stouffer. You won’t believe –
JUDY
I don’t think I want to go anywhere until this is all settled, if you don’t mind. Thank you, though. I do like Vander Meer’s.
JONI
Everybody does. Let’s just let the boys hash this out and come on inside to talk some dirt about Carrie Stouffer. You always like that. I’m telling you, you just won’t believe –
JUDY
You go on if you want to.
JONI
Well. No. I guess I’ll stay, too.
JUDY
It’s your property.
KYLE
That’s the point, isn’t it? It’s our property.
LARRY
Don’t you know what something like this could mean to everybody in the county?
KYLE
A lot of money, I guess.
LARRY
It’s college tuition. Retirement. New houses in Omaha. Maybe even Minneapolis or Chicago, if you wanted; anywhere you want to go.
KYLE
We don’t want to go anywhere.
LARRY
Maybe the rest of us do.
JONI
Well then maybe the rest of you can just go on ahead and go.
LARRY
They’re only going to buy if we all sell, Joni.
JUDY
Yeah. Wanna buy a farm, Joni?
KYLE
You’re welcome to stay for some coffee and rolls if you want to, but I’m done talking about niobium.
LARRY
This is a once in a lifetime deal.
KYLE
I heard their sales pitch.
LARRY
It’s the future, man. And not just for us. For America.
JUDY
Yeah. America!
KYLE
Now I’m un-American?
LARRY
When was the last time you turned a profit?
JUDY
Larry, let me. Kyle. My liege. Please. Listen to me. If this is about that night after the homecoming dance –
LARRY KYLE JONI
Christ, Judy. No. Are you serious?
JUDY
No. Now, we never really talked about that night and maybe you just need some closure.
KYLE
I’m all closed up.
JUDY
I… I never apologized. You shouldn’t have found out about me and Larry the way you did. And I’m… well I’m sorry.
KYLE
Thank you.
JUDY
Good. Now. Larry?
LARRY
What?
JUDY
Larry’s sorry, too. Aren’t you, Larry?
LARRY
Sure.
JUDY
Everybody thinks the Homecoming King and Queen are supposed to end up together, Kylie. Happily ever after. But, we’re adults now. We know life just doesn’t work that way. Don’t we? And you know it would have never worked out between us. You see that, don’t you?
KYLE
Yeah.
JUDY
You… you and Joni, bless her heart. Well. You’re a better fit.
JONI
Thank you.
JUDY
You’re welcome. Let’s face it. I was just… I’m a lot of woman –
LARRY
Judy Anne Moore. Go stand over there and don’t move until I say so.
JUDY
Why? Because you’re the man?
LARRY points. Beat. JUDY EXITS.
LARRY
Sorry about that.
KYLE JONI
It’s fine. Whatever.
LARRY
Batteries are the future. Everybody says so.
KYLE
That’s nice. Excuse us.
LARRY
They need that niobium. And it’s just right there.
KYLE
Right where, Larry. Where is it. I don’t see anything. Joni, you see anything?
LARRY
It’s in the dirt, Larry. You are literally standing on a fortune. And right now it’s just dirt until they dig it out.
KYLE
What? What did you say?
JUDY
from off stage
He said it’s just dirt until they dig it out!
LARRY
They need niobium in the wind turbines, and… and batteries, and the cell phones.
Everything’s going to be run on batteries. If we don’t do this, China’s just going to eat our lunch.
KYLE
Have you ever seen what strip mining looks like? What it actually means?
LARRY
It’s nothing compared to global warming, buddy. How ‘bout that? You’ve heard of global warming, haven’t you?
JUDY from off stage
It’s called climate change now, Larry!
LARRY
Well, we can fix it. Over in Iowa they’ve got a stripe of wind turbines running right down the middle of the state. Dang-it, Kyle. The very dirt we’re standing on could light up the whole world. China too. Think of that. Think how grateful they’d be to us. To you.
JUDY singing from off stage
You got the whole world… in your hands [1]
You got the whole stinking world… in your hands. You got the whole world…in your hands.
You got the whole world in your hands!
LARRY
Thank you, Judy. This is about the clean energy.
KYLE
A few years ago Obama was calling coal ‘clean energy.’ None of it’s clean, Larry. None of it. One way or another, it’s all dirty.
LARRY
This is different. It’s the Green New Deal, and we got to get on board now, before it’s too late. It means hundreds of jobs for the county, and –
KYLE
The only green I’m interested in is the green of my soy beans.
LARRY
Don’t sell, then. Craig’s planning to lease the land to ‘em. Hell, I wish I’d thought of that.
He says he’ll be getting millions a year in royalties.
KYLE
What is Willard Craig going to do with millions of dollars a year in royalties? A six pack of Schlitz is eight bucks. Even he can’t drink that much.
LARRY
Yeah, well maybe he wants a Michelob Ultra every now and then. In a glass.
KYLE
He doesn’t need a Michelob Ultra. What do any of us need that we don’t already have?
LARRY
Peace of mind, Kyle. I need peace of mind.
KYLE
Money isn’t going to do that.
LARRY
When we’ve got enough of it, it will. Please.
KYLE
OK. How much is enough?
JUDY from off stage
You never knew when to take a risk, Kyle! Never took one in your entire life. That’s why you and me woulda never worked out! That’s why, Kyle. Yep. That’s why.
JONI
Hey! How many ways do we have to tell you we’re not interested?
LARRY
Joni, I’m telling you, our future’s in the dirt!
JUDY singing – adding clapping from off stage
He says our future is… in the dirt.
Yep, our whole freakin’ future’s… in the dirt.
LARRY
Judy! Truck.
We hear the truck door open and close.
KYLE
You know there’s something wrong with that woman, don’t you?
LARRY
I know.
JONI
Hey! Don’t you talk about her that way.
LARRY
What?
JONI
She’s your wife. Sure, she’s strange. But you married her, and she was that way when you did it, so don’t you talk about her that way.
LARRY
Well, excuse me.
JONI
I will not excuse you. You know, Larry, the trouble with you has always been you’ve got no respect for anybody or anything. What do we do when we use up all the niobium? Huh? Five minutes ago you were dreaming about shooting that big, juicy doe. What does she do when there’s nothing but a great big hole in the ground where Nebraska used to be? Eat dirt?
LARRY
It won’t be like that.
JONI
It will be exactly like that. When you really get down to it, what’s the difference between niobium and oil? Seems to me we ought figure out what we’re going to do once we use up all the niobium and just do that now. Oh, but then maybe nobody gets millions a year in royalties.
LARRY
The trouble with you is you think small.
JONI
I am small. So are you. And so are Kyle and Judy. But I happen to like that we’re small, and I can’t help you if you don’t. We’re all just small people living on a speck of dirt, hurtling through space, but only the really stupid people think it’s a fine and dandy idea to hollow out that speck of dirt just so they can have a new iPhone! This dirt is all we’ve got! This dirt is the only thing that means anything! Oil or niobium. When you get right down to it, what the hell’s the difference, Larry? What’s the difference?
LARRY
I am not a small person!!
JONI
I’m sorry, Larry. And I’m sorry I hurt your feelings by calling you stupid.
LARRY
Because I’m not stupid?
JONI
Oh, Larry. I’m sorry I hurt your feelings by calling you stupid.
LARRY
Thank you.
JONI
I just think that instead of trying to replace oil, maybe we’re, all of us – I don’t know – focusing on the wrong question?
LARRY
What’s the right question?
JONI
How much is enough?
KYLE
Sshhh. Look.
Beat.
LARRY
I’ll be damned.
The three of them are silent and still as they look
off into the distance. For the first time we hear
birds chirping. A dog barks. The farmers are in awe
of what they see.
There’s a blast from the horn of the truck, and the
spell is broken.
KYLE
Will climate change still be a problem after a cup of coffee?
LARRY
I guess.
JONI
Judy! We’re going inside for some coffee and cinnamon rolls! Come on in and let me tell you how Carrie Stouffer got her yeast infection. It’s the dam’dest thing.
JONI exits.
LARRY
What does she mean, “How much is enough?”
KYLE
It’s a philosophical question, Larry. Let’s get some coffee.
LARRY
I don’t know how much is enough. Do you, Kyle? What a question. How much is enough? Enough of what? You never know how much is enough until you’ve got too much. Who has too much money? Is that what she means? Do you think that’s what she means?
KYLE
I don’t know. Judy!? Come on!
KYLE and LARRY EXIT. A beat. The sound of a truck
door opening and closing. JUDY ENTERS.
JUDY singing to herself as she stomps across the yard
We’ve got the wind and the rain… in our hands. We’ve got the wind and the rain… in our hands. We’ve got the wind and the rain… in our hands. We’ve got whole world in our hands.
JUDY EXITS. Birds chirp. A dog barks. Another answers.
The sound of a car passing on a dirt road.
Lights fade.
END OF PLAY
[1] “He’s Got the Whole World in His Hands” – a folk-slave spiritual
Scott Carter Cooper is a Chicago-based playwright whose sharp, character-driven works balance humor with social critique. His short plays – ranging from the bittersweet intimacy of “The Good Stuff,” to the irreverent comedy of “P.S. I Love You, Gerard Butler,” to the political bite of “The Donor Class” have been presented by such companies as NyLon Fusion, American Blues, The Artistic Home, Ghostlight Ensemble, Chicago Dramatists and microChicago, as well as festivals nationwide and abroad. His work often spotlights diverse ensembles in tight, high-stakes situations. Cooper holds a BFA – Theatre from Drake University and an MA – Writing from DePaul University. scottcartercooper.com
